Pictures of Enzo's Memorial Service

On October 6, 2010, 6-month old Enzo was in a car accident with his parents and older brother and sister. Almost 48 hours later, he went home to be with Jesus. This blog is run by his family members and is our way of sharing our grief and hope with everyone who cares to visit. We rejoice in knowing that one day we will be reunited with Enzo in eternity! If you would like to contact us, you can email us at (not case-sensitive).

Monday, December 20, 2010

Unsure how to pray? Try this...

This morning I was reading the book of Ephesians and I came across these incredible verses. If you want to pray for Todd and Kate (or anybody you know, really!), but are unsure how to, start with this!

Ephesians 3:14 - 19

When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father, the Creator of everything in Heaven and on earth. I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God's love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

I am encouraged by the book of Job in the Bible, as he lost everything but after he was restored, still lived a long, full life, it says. After such great loss, is it really possible to be restored and then live a life that is considered long and full? Evidently so. I would encourage you to read Job chapters 1, 2 and 42 to see this. (You can find it right before the book of Psalms).

God's Blessings to you all this Christmas week!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

The Silversmith

PSALM 66:10,12: "You have tested us, O God. You have purified us like silver... We went through fire and flood, but you brought us to a place of great abundance."

Malachi 3: 2-3 says that the Lord is like a blazing fire that refines metal. He will sit like a refiner of silver, watching closely as the dross is burned away.

The story goes that once there was a woman who, after reading that passage in the Bible, wanted to find out exactly what a silversmith does. So she took herself down to his shop to watch him work. He bent closely over the silver, as he held it in the fire. As that silver endured the heat and pressure, it's impurities rose to the surface. The silversmith scraped away the dross, layer by layer, as it rose. As this happened, the silver became purer by the moment. The lady then asked him why he watched the silver so closely. He replied that he must watch it closely, for even a few seconds too long in the fire and the silver would be injured. The lady asked how he knew the silver was refined - and he replied "That's easy. It's done when I see my image in it."

How much like this, is our suffering? During the hottest, most intense pressure of our lives, our ugliness rises to the surface, doesn't it? I have seen this come from my own heart during the "heat."

But what struck me the most about this story is the silversmith's wisdom in knowing exactly how long the silver should be refined. Sometimes we don't think we can bear any more. But we can rest assured that God is watching us closely - He will not allow the suffering for one moment longer than necessary. He will lift the burden when He can see His image in us. 

Sometimes when I talk to my sister and brother-in-law, I fall to my knees BEGGING God to relieve their suffering. I am so afraid they hurt too much. I am so afraid they will be injured or destroyed, like the silver if left too long in the fire. This has been a struggle of mine lately. I have even gone so far as to dream up ways for ME to relieve their suffering a little (I guess it's a good thing I don't have a million dollars to send them on a  vacation?!?!) But this morning when I heard this story, peace washed over my soul when I realized that God is watching them far more closely than I ever could. In his wisdom, he knows what he is doing. He is the master silversmith and we are his precious silver. God loves Todd and Kate more than I ever could. He is far wiser than I will ever be. And believe it or not, I trust Jesus more than I did before all of this happened. (It does not mean I understand better, however :)).

I know that one day, our family will look back on this time and see it more clearly for what it is. Not that we will ever stop missing Enzo and longing for his chubby embrace - but after speaking with others in my life who have lost a child, I know that someday the sun will shine a little brighter in our lives. Our perspective will be a little clearer, the pain won't be so crippling. I choose to trust the Master Silversmith, even when the fire hurts.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010


Hello dear loved ones! I truly apologize for going over a month with no new posts. I would like to have a better reason for this, but I will just tell you the truth (perhaps I should have created a few posts that said "Nothing to say!").

The secret behind my (Melissa's) writing is God. He usually inspires me with something to say and I say it. But ever since November 4, the last post, I have been inspired with nothing. I have logged on to this blog many times to update and had.... nothing. I've asked for words and had.... nothing. I've had brief glimpses of thoughts and they have disappeared before I could write them. But suddenly over the last couple of days, I feel the floodgates have opened yet again and I hope to be able to post more faithfully. Truthfully, I believe the Lord was behind this "silent" time. I don't know the reason, but He is the master and controller of my thoughts, words and posts. So I will trust Him in that.

First, an update on the family. Life is moving on, but Todd and Kate are not. The world keeps turning and it's a little infuriating!!! It would seem appropriate to declare holiday for the entire world to just stop! I believe that any person in grief feels this way. Life has become harder for Zo's parents. It is truly a dark, dark valley they are walking right now. Please continue your prayers for them - pray that they would find comfort in God's love, that their marriage would be strong (there is hardly any greater strain on a marriage than the death of a child), and that they would have HOPE, light at the end of the tunnel. Pray that God would breathe new life into them.

While up in Breckenridge, Colorado over Thanksgiving week, I walked into a Christmas store and saw these beautiful ornaments. (Of course it also began the waterworks right in the middle of the store). I purchased five of them - one for each sister's family and my parents. Ours is hanging front and center on our tree this year. I look at it every day and thank Jesus that he gave Enzo to us for six months. In the midst of my tears, I thank God that Enzo will never again experience the pain of this life here on earth - that he is in a perfect place, experiencing life as it was meant to be lived. Jesus, tell Enzo we miss him and cannot wait to see him again.

I have more to write, so stay tuned. Meanwhile, here is a great song I dedicate to Todd and Kate, in their valley of the shadow of death. It's called "Forgive Me," by Group 1 Crew (a fabulous music group): ENJOY!

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Weeks 3 - 8

Hi everyone!

Today my husband Matt spoke with a friend of his who lost a child some years ago. He shared some things that really touched our hearts and we would like to pass along to you.

He said that after losing their child, week numbers 3 – 8 were the darkest and most brutal times for them. This is just about when the incredible outpouring of love begins to diminish. Oh, you know that people still care – it’s just that life goes on. For everyone else. But not for them. The loneliness, isolation and despair can be overwhelming when the initial flurry of activity dies down.

It has now been four weeks since our precious Enzo went to be with Jesus. If the same thing goes for Todd and Kate as for our friends, this is right about the time we, as their loved ones and as a community, need to step up our efforts to be there for them. In their heads, they know we all still care, even if we had to return to normal life. But when you are walking a despairing road, logical thinking isn’t exactly balm for the soul. It’s kind words, encouraging notes, visits, cards, time spent together, listening, etc. that says we are still here, walking this road with them as best we can.

Whatever stage a grieving person is in, we do not have the power to pull them out. I do not suggest we try to “fix” anyone so they can move on. That is not our job. But we can buy a gift, send an email, do a kind service, drop a note in the mail, sit and talk, provide a good distraction for an afternoon. These are the things that will show we still care, even if life has had to resume for us. These are the things that will help them through the grief.

Matt asked his friend if, during this time, he wanted people to talk about their child or not. He said that the worst times were when people would ignore the fact that their child had just died. It was like an elephant in the room, but it was ALL he could think about. He said it helped tremendously to talk about it. I know what it’s like when you don’t know what to say. But what you say doesn’t have to be perfect. Don’t be afraid to bring it up – most likely they WANT to talk about him!

So, if you feel a nudge in your heart to do something for Todd and Kate, by all means, TAKE ACTION! J

Additionally, this is a beautiful song by Natalie Grant about God’s promise to us when “the sacred is torn from your life, but you survive.” This is the song HELD:

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Great Contacts!

We have received so many emails and contacts from people we don't know - people who were somehow touched by Enzo's life and death. Here are a few I would like to share for you all to be encouraged by!

A staff member at Harrison Hospital in Bremerton:
"i just wanted to tell you how much baby Enzo has touched my life, i was one of the staff with him when he went for his first CT when he arrived at Harrison, and i just wanted to say that i will never forget that night and how beautiful and peacefull looking he was and i was able to hold his hand for just a brief period time, i should have emailed sooner to give my condolences. i say a little prayer everytime i pass the balloons at the fred meyer intersection. i think this tragic accident will forever have brought a part of our communtiy together. "
Thank you dear lady for holding our sweet Enzo's hand in the last hours of his life! For taking care of him so sweetly when we were not there yet!!!

A 911 Operator:
"I am an Emergency Telecommunicator, basically a 911 operator/dispatcher. In fact I used to work in Kitsap County and know every one of the call takers and dispatchers, as well as a few responders that were involved with this horrific collision. I happened to be listening to my scanner that fateful night and heard the call go out. I immediately contacted my friends who were working to find out the specifics. 
For some reason, this call and the radio traffic gripped at my soul. I have taken and dispatched every emergency call imaginable, homicides-cardiac it. I was even able to give instructions for child CPR that resulted in a "save". Again...for some reason, this one stuck out. I sincerely prayed for young Zo!! I have read every blog, article, snippet....everything. This young angel touched me! Because of this, I am determined as ever to be the BEST at what I do, that includes getting back to my police officer roots and getting on the streets to "protect and serve".........Thank You Enzo 
From the deepest depths of my heart...Thank you Zo!!
Again sorry for the loss....I have taken it as a lifting of my soul!"
Thank you so very much sir, for the great work that you do in the community! Yours is a tough job - thank you for being strong and a hero - and for saving lives!

Finally, from a pediatric nurse:
"I live in Louisiana. I am originally from Silverdale and a dear friend of mine shared your story and blog link on facebook. I am currently a nursing student and about to graduate. I have spent 2 semesters working in the PICU's down here and am hoping to work at Mary Bridge when I graduate. Your story really hit home for me and I prayed for Baby Enzo and your family. I have 3 small children myself and hearing stories like this is so difficult. Just before I heard of Baby Enzo's accident I had a patient, a 15 month old code and pass away. It was the first time I had experienced this and it was very difficult. I spent that night in tears, and struggled with my choice to pursue pediatric nursing. I had always felt that working with children was a calling and yet after the passing of my patient I wondered if I was making the right decision. When I read baby Enzo's story, I cried for him and your family. Your blogs however and Enzo inspired me. To have been able to be there for him and your family as a nurse would have been an honor. To read about the nurse who stopped to do CPR, made me realize that my actions as a nurse can change the life of someone as special as Enzo, even if it means giving his family 48 more hours. Your family is my prayers."
Dear nurse, you are right that your calling IS worthy - you could be a huge difference in a family's life! Thank you so much for writing to us and sharing your story.

If you would like to write us, please email us at We respond to every email and so appreciate hearing from people – it helps us through our grief to know that lives are being touched through Enzo’s life and death.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Find us on Facebook

Of course we will continue our blogging here... but we have also set up a Facebook page where you can (easier than here) view pictures of Zo and see more discussions and activity going on. Feel free to come join us, and "like" the page in memory of Enzo!

Love Letter from Jesus

Good evening friends! I just came across this on Facebook, and was so moved by it, I just had to share with you all. If you have given your life to Jesus, or are growing closer to him, or just desire to know Jesus, this letter is for you! Karen Kingsbury comprised it entirely out of scripture. You can find the original link here:

(The following was arranged by Karen Kingsbury and is comprised entirely from Scripture.)

Dear Friend,
Forget what happened before, and do not think about the past. Look at the new thing I am going to do. It's already happening. Don't you see it? I will make a road in the desert and rivers in the dry land.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the LORD will give you. …  Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out to face them …  and the LORD will be with you.

            For nothing is impossible with God.

Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. Make level paths for your feet, so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed. For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline

Since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.
Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
            Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance,
(Continued on back)
character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.
    For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.

    So I will always remind you of these things, even though you know them and are firmly established in the truth you now have. . . . And we have the word of the prophets made more certain, and you will do well to pay attention to it, as to a light shining in a dark place, until the day dawns and the morning star rises in your hearts.            
I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live.

            I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.

            I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

             Finally . . . whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

Forget what happened before, and do not think about the past. Look at the new thing I am going to do. It's already happening. Don't you see it? I will make a road in the desert and rivers in the dry land.
I have loved you with an everlasting love . . .
Love always,


Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Update on Zo's parents

The question I get asked most frequently is how Zo’s parents (my sister Kate and brother-in-law Todd) are holding up after losing a child. So, I thought I would go ahead and give you all some of the things Kate has said to me over the last week! The following is bits and pieces of things she has told me over several conversations. J (with her blessing to share it of course!)

Most days, this is what Kate says:

I wonder to myself everyday why I’m not depressed all the time. But then I remember how amazing the strength is that God is giving me. I feel so confident and happy about the fact that he is in Heaven. It is the peace that (our sister) Beth prayed for, right as he died in that hospital room.

It’s tempting to feel bad about it, but I do not feel the need to cry constantly. If I feel tears coming on, then I let them out of course. It’s tempting to feel guilty to smile. But most of the time it’s like I am so at peace with where he is. Don’t get me wrong, I think about Zo ALL the time, am very sad about it and I do miss him terrrrrribly. It’s very hard to describe. Then again, it really is the strength God is giving me.

I do not believe that God took Zo away because I was “bad” or anything like that – like a punishment. He really just had a short mission here on earth for little Zo. Sadly, it had to be my baby for the short mission. But God is constantly trying to tell me that I can’t do this on my own. Zo’s life and death has really opened the eyes and hearts of a lot of people and I believe that is what he was sent here to do.

On one particularly rough day, Kate wrote this:

We were sad today because we were over by Fred Meyer. And later, I needed to use his crib mattress for Sadie, but I had not touched his bed yet. But taking his stuff out of the crib… that opened the floodgates. I know it’s okay to have a breakdown every once in awhile and that’s what happened tonight. I cried hard but now feel stable.

Right now we are just trying to hang strong. God is keeping us strong. We know Zo is happy in Heaven and that is the most important thing. We miss him terribly – words cannot describe how badly we miss him. But he is playing with Jesus and we know that. We are going to be trying to continue with our lives soon. He will always be our sweet baby. We continue to rely on God for our strength and He will get us through. Although right now all we want to do is hold our Zozo.

Please continue to pray for Todd and Kate as they walk the journey of grief, and pass through it's different stages. Pray that they could bear the "new normal" and thrive in it. And most of all, pray that Jesus would hold them tightly in comfort!

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Spaghetti Dinner and Silent Auction

Hi everyone - I should have posted this sooner!

Monday evening, October 25th, there will be a Spaghetti Dinner and Silent Auction held the Elks Lodge in East Bremerton. Doors open at 5:40 p.m. Tickets are 2 for $25 for $15 each. Local artist Krystle Spoon will be performing, and there will be some fabulous things to bid on! All proceeds will benefit the Williams Family.

The little white casket

Yesterday when I saw the pictures of Zo in his casket, I could not find words to describe anything. He was buried on what would have been his seven month birthday. Heaviness settled over me and I just tried to keep it together all day so I wasn’t a blubbering mess at my kids’ soccer games.  Today I have gotten used to seeing the pictures of him, his little white casket and the rainy dreary weather they had for the graveside service. But that heaviness still sits on me and the only thing I have running through my head is how wrong a baby casket is. How wrong any casket is. There are some words playing over and over in my head like a broken record player: “It wasn’t supposed to be this way.”

Indeed. Parents were never supposed to bury their children.

When God created us in His image, death was not a part of the equation. Created in our perfect states, we were never supposed to die. But alas, Eve took a bite of that blasted apple, and suddenly perfect everlasting life was out of reach. Death became a part of life now. Our sin now separated us from God like the Grand Canyon, and a curse now weighs over all creation.

But God had a plan – as always. J He sent his only son as Savior of the world so that we could once again have that perfect eternal life with Him. While living on this earth, all creation is still under the curse. But what hope we have that one day we will be with Zozo again! And with all of our loved ones who have accepted Jesus Christ as their savior! And best of all, with Jesus himself in that everlasting life. And we will live in a place that is not under the curse any longer! Can I get an amen?!?!

So I can look at Enzo’s casket with grief, but not despair. We can feel how wrong it is to be burying someone we love, but know that one day nothing will ever be wrong again. I can’t wait for that day!!!

Todd and Kate chose “There Will Be A Day” by Jeremy Camp to be performed at the Memorial Service. You can watch it here:

2 Corinthians 4:7-9 “But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. “

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Grief Today

Psalms 34:18 “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

I think the entire family’s spirits are somewhat subdued, as today is the day we bury our sweet precious Enzo at a private family service. I don’t have words to express what I feel when looking at a baby-sized casket. And I usually always have words to describe what I am feeling. But not today.

So this post is going to be short, as in, not filled with my original thoughts, as many others posts have been. Please pray for us as his body is put in the ground to rest and as we come to terms with the finality of the last two weeks.

Psalm 61:2 “When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I.” Sometimes our grief is too overwhelming for us. Thank you Jesus that we can come to you, as we are, without having to be strong. Thank you that you can handle our grief, our emotions, our questions. Thank you that you stick by us when we don't understand and our faith gets shaky.

"Hold My Heart" by Tenth Avenue North:

Grace and Peace to you all.

Thursday, October 21, 2010


Happy Thursday everyone!

Over the last two weeks, our family has been praised a lot. We've been praised for our strength, for our joy, for our forgiveness, for anything and everything... and while we appreciate the compliments, what we really want to say is, "It's not us. Truly not us." I will share with you our secret (if you don't already know).

I have heard people say that being a follower of Christ is only for people who are weak. To that I say, "Darn right!" We are weak and we know it. One of my favorite verses in scripture is 2 Corinthians 12:9 which says, "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness." (I would actually recommend reading the whole section for context). I once heard someone use this passage to ask, "Are you weak enough for God to use you?" As a society, we pride ourselves on being strong and self-sufficient. But this is actually the opposite of what God wants - I admit my weakness, that I cannot do this life on my own!

We are weak, just like everyone else. We definitely have our bad days more than we'd like. And we do have moments we question God's wisdom in this tragedy.

The other day I had a relatively peaceful day - a "good" day in these times of grief. The air outside was crisp but my home was warm, the leaves were beautiful, I was burning cinnamon candles in my autumn-decorated living room, and I was in the kitchen cooking something fabulous (one of my passions!). And because fall is my favorite time of year, I felt snug and happy. I could even think back on events of the last 10 days and feel completely at peace. It was a good day.

But not two hours later, that all changed. I happened to see a video of Zo - my first since his death. The only thing I had seen up to that point were still pictures - I had not even seen him because I arrived after he passed. While watching that first video, tidal waves of grief crashed over me, knocking me over and not letting me up again. I didn't sleep much that night as I cried out in agony to the Lord, "Why? Why was his life cut short? Why are you allowing my sister to lose a child?" for hours on end.

But in that night - and in ANY night of grief - God's strong arms were holding me. He was big enough to handle my questions and emotions. Let me say that again because it's very powerful: He is BIG enough to handle our grief, our emotions, and our questions! We can safely rest in Him as we wrestle with His plans and purposes.

And as the sun rose the next morning, so did my spirits. I chose once again to cling to the Lord. My Topsy-turvy emotions and sleep-deprived body could have so easily chosen to reject the peace and comfort He offers. Letting God's strength work in our weakness is the ONLY reason our family is thriving, growing and hanging on after losing Enzo. We don't desire to be praised ourselves, but to give ALL the glory to God!

This peace and comfort can be yours. Truly, we put one foot in front of the other simply by placing our faith in the person of Jesus Christ. And the beauty is that this is available to everyone - FREE! If you are going through a hard time, I urge you to place your faith in Jesus - circumstances won't necessarily get easier, but won't it be nice to have Jesus with you as you walk the painful road? To get guidance from the one who knows ALL? To be able to hear from Him anytime you open the Bible? To be able to pray and tell him your thoughts, fears, joys, hopes, dreams, disappointments? I can assure you there is nothing more worth it in this world.

Philippians 4:13, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

Grace and Peace,
Auntie Melissa

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Pictures of Enzo's Memorial Service

Hello friends!

It is my privilege to share with you pictures of the Memorial Service from October 12, 2010. You should be able to see them here:

I should have an update from Todd and Kate and how they are doing soon.....

Psalm 126:3 "The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy!"

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Good Samaritans

In the aftermath of the accident, there were some people we are calling "Good Samaritans" who, although perfect strangers, took time out of their busy lives to help Todd, Kate and the family. I would like to tell you a little about them and what they did here.

Immediately after the accident, a nurse stopped to help. When Todd and Kate realized Enzo was not breathing, she performed CPR on him until the paramedics arrived. She revived his little body and allowed our family the next 46 hours to say goodbye. Had she not stopped to help, Enzo probably would have died at the scene within minutes. After the accident, nobody knew who she was or where she had gone. I (Auntie Melissa) remember telling our sisters that after the Memorial Service I was going to do everything in my power to find her. We wanted to thank her for giving us that extra time with Enzo.
Near the end of our sharing time at the Memorial Service, a lady came up to the front of the church. I will never forget her words: "My name is Judi and I am a nurse. I performed CPR on Enzo." Gasps were heard throughout the church, and Todd and Kate and their parents jumped up and embraced her. Truly there was not a dry eye in the church at this moment. Judi went on to say that as a nurse, they are required to take CPR and First Aid courses frequently. It's always been somewhat of a wearisome and bothersome thing to add to the schedule. But after the accident, Judi said she will never complain about taking the classes again. Thank you Judi for coming and introducing yourself to us.

Another lady who stopped to help was Karen. She was not supposed to be pulling out of Fred Meyer that night - every other Wednesday night she was always at church with her husband. But this night, she had opted to stay home and get some groceries from the store. When she saw the accident, she stood over Todd, Kate and Enzo (as Judi performed CPR) and prayed without ceasing for the family. Karen also came up front at the Memorial Service to introduce herself. Thank you Karen, from the bottom of our hearts.

Melissa came upon the accident shortly after it happened. She felt the urge to stop and see if she could use her CPN skills to help. She noticed that my mom, Zo's Nana, had arrived at the scene without any shoes on, but there was glass all over the ground. Melissa ran into Fred Meyer and bought a pair of flip flops for Nana to put on her feet so she wouldn't get cut. Again, after the accident, nobody knew who she was. A good friend from church happened to be speaking to an acquaintance about the accident and mentioned someone had bought flip flops for Nana to wear. The acquaintance said, "That was my daughter who did that." So we were able to get in touch with Melissa and she too came to the Memorial Service. (Melissa is on the left in the picture).

If you know of any other acts of kindness that were done, please either leave a comment or email it to We would like to have the opportunity to thank all who took the time and effort to help.

If I got anything in these stories wrong, be sure to let me know and I will correct them asap. I was going off memory, but it's been an emotional time and who knows what I am missing! :)

Contact Us

I have heard that it can be really temperamental to post comments here on the blog... additionally, everything you post is for the whole world to see! So I created an email account you can contact us at privately if you wish! Email us (not case-sensitive).

We would love to hear from you if Enzo's life and death, the accident itself, or this blog has touched you in any way.

Blessings on you, friends!
Auntie Melissa

Monday, October 18, 2010

Prayer for the other driver - Forgiveness and Mercy

Good morning friends -

This morning, I would like to ask for prayer for the driver of the Yukon (which hit Kate's car) and his family. They did not want this to happen any more than we did, and their family is deeply struggling too. They have asked to remain anonymous here on this public blog and I will respect that - I will call him "Sam" and his wife, "Julie." Anyone who was at the Memorial Service will most likely never forget the display of forgiveness, grace and redemption we witnessed.

Near the end of the sharing time last Tuesday, a woman walked - or, rather, was very nearly carried - by three other women, to the front of the church. She had been sitting in the back for the service and needed some fresh air outside, where these other women found her, figured out who she was, and brought her up front. Bless these three women who stood up there with her and supported her.

If you haven't already guessed, it was Julie. The tears fell as she over and over again said how sorry her family was that this had happened. She explained that Sam had not left his bed since the night of the accident, he couldn't eat, couldn't sleep. My mom went up and stood with her then. Julie sobbed as she looked right at Todd and said, "He wants to die, bro!" And at that moment, Todd and Kate jumped up and held a long embrace with her. Pastor Joe and my dad also came up and the whole service prayed for Sam and Julie and their family.

It was quite possibly, the most vivid picture I have ever witnessed of forgiveness in "unforgivable" circumstances.

Forgiveness is not saying the wrong they have done you is okay. It also does not mean you won't want to see justice done, if needed (and indeed, there is an investigation underway for the cause of the crash). But forgiveness IS giving up my right to hurt you, for hurting me. It is releasing them to the Lord, not allowing bitterness to be in our hearts. And we know that God is both complete justice and complete grace. It means that we don't have to worry about making sure they suffer as much as we have.

I have heard whisperings that Sam needs to pay, that he doesn't deserve forgiveness. But that is not our family's true heart. Jesus died on the cross for Sam hitting Kate's car, just as he died for the lie I told yesterday, or the hurtful way I spoke to my kids this morning. Romans 6:23 says "The wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus." (NIV) My sin is no different than Sam's, although the earthly consequences may be different.

Colossians 3:13 -" Make allowance for each other's faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others." (NLT)

Let me also say that the choice of forgiveness is done in a moment - but the feelings of forgiveness take a much longer time. Let us choose to forgive today, and our feelings will learn to follow.

I found the below quotes on forgiveness and thought to share them all with you - I pray you are encouraged!


Forgiveness is the giving, and so the receiving, of life. --George MacDonald

To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover the prisoner was you.—Unknown

He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass.--George Herbert

Resentment is like a glass of poison that a man drinks; then he sits down and waits for his enemy to die.—Unknown

You will know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well. --Lewis B. Smedes

Forgiveness is me giving up my right to hurt you for hurting me. --Anonymous

Sunday, October 17, 2010

A word from Papa

One special moment at the memorial service last week was when my dad (Zo's Papa) read a letter he had written to Zo. There was hardly a dry eye in the church, and my dad could hardly read it for his tears - but he was determined to read it himself, and he did. Here is the letter (grab some Kleenex):

Hi Zozo, my dear little Grandson, you had only 6 months on this earth,
but I had grown even more attached to you than I had thought and more precious. 

I have never cried so hard nor
so often before your young life was cut short. 

I will miss your cute little smile that you would show me whenever I called your name or whenever I would play peek-a-boo with you. 

When they took you away in the ambulance, I thought, “you will be ok, -
God and the doctors will make your owie better.”

But the doctors said your owie might be too big to fix. 
So I prayed really hard -  your Nana prayed really hard. 
So did your Mommy & Daddy. 
And a whole lot of other people from all over the world. 

Your Mommy kept asking you to come back to us. 
I also heard your Mommy say “I never gave up on you baby.”

But, I guess Jesus had other plans for you. 
Jesus wanted you to be with him.

I wished I could have played catch with you here on the earth, but I will have to wait until I get to heaven to play catch with you.

While my heart is very, very sad today,
I have joy knowing that I will be with you again.

I love you Enzo,
Your Papa.

A word from Nana

Good morning friends - here is an expanded version of the incredible parallel my mom (Zo's Nana) shared at the memorial service last week.

As Christians, we know in our heads and our hearts the sacrifice that God made of his son Jesus Christ; an offering free of sin and blemish, because God loved the world and the people in it and paid the price so that we could one day see Him face to face.  I can guarantee one of the first verses Christians memorize is John 3:16, "For God so loved the world He gave His only begotten Son, that whomsoever shall believe in him will not perish but have everlasting life."
Late in the afternoon on October 8th, 2010, I saw something in the PICU unit of Mary Bridge Children's Hospital that brought the enormity of that verse to life, an insight into the very character of God, what His love for us means in very real terms.
It was time to remove our baby Enzo from the tubes that were keeping his body alive.  It was gutwrenching for Papa and me, but the picture of Enzo's daddy, reaching out for his son and holding his failing body close, hunched over, heaving sobs coming from his soul caused me to pause in my own grief, and I realized that our Heavenly Father was allowing me to see something very, very special.  I suddenly did not see Todd and baby Zozo, finishing out his very brief time here on earth.  I saw God the Father, holding Jesus Christ after the price had been paid for us.  I suddenly felt just a small portion of the Father's anguish and pain as he willingly gave up part of himself to mark mankind's sin paid in full.  It was stunning.  
Enzo Steven Williams' life was so brief here on earth, but his soul is eternal.  And I am thankful for the gift of Jesus, because I know that one day I will be reunited with my Zozo.  He'll probably look at me with those big brown eyes and say, "Nana, what took you so long?" 

Saturday, October 16, 2010

The story behind "Zo's sunset"

Zo’s Sunset

Recently at the Women of Faith Conference in Denver I attended, Sheila Walsh said something that struck me significantly at the time and now I shall never forget. She said “When God interrupts your schedule, PAY ATTENTION, because He is going to do something.” In the two weeks that followed, I found this to be true in small ways in my everyday life when God’s plans were not my plans for a day.

However, this became a striking reality in my life last week. At the time of the accident, my husband was in Africa for his job with Compassion International. So my best friend Michelle packed us up in my van, and we began the 1400 mile trek up to the Seattle area.

The first night was endless. We drove through Wyoming in the pitch black of night. We encountered severe winds, thunderstorms, blinding rain and delays. At one point, we were even stopped on the freeway because I-80 had been temporarily closed. All I wanted to do was speed through Wyoming and this night, make some progress toward the northwest, but it was extremely slow going. It was dark, unfamiliar and scary – and it felt like we were NEVER going to get there. Additionally, my grief was beginning to settle hard on me this night. My soul felt despairing, very much like the road we were driving on. I am a rational person, but in my grief I really wondered if the sun was ever going to rise.

The next day was overcast and rainy as we made our way through Utah, Idaho and Oregon. This day, too, seemed endless. We must have looked at the clock thousands of times. It dragged on and on. We alternated between despair and hope as different reports came from my family throughout the day.

We got word that Snoqualmie Pass along I-90 had been closed the night before and was likely to be again that evening by the time we reached it. Not wanting to risk getting stuck on the highway for a second time, we made the decision to take the alternate route through Portland, Oregon. At first I was very upset that we had to take this route because it would add an extra hour onto our already endless journey. It was at this time that Michelle reminded me of the quote from Sheila Walsh – “When God interrupts your schedule, pay attention, because He is going to do something.” That was exactly what I needed to hear. I settled back into my seat and tried to trust that God knew what he was doing.

About 5:30 p.m. on that day, October 8, 2010, as we drove along the Columbia River Gorge, we got the phone call that Enzo’s body was beginning to shut down and he would probably pass away at anytime. A few minutes later, the sun came out from behind the clouds and shone brightly on us. And it was brilliant. It turned the brown hills into mounds of gold dust. It turned the river into a sea of shimmering glass. It shone it’s warmth on our faces. And Michelle commented that this was the first time on our entire trip the sun had come out.

At that time, peace washed over our souls. We felt that this was God’s spirit coming down to comfort us. Whereas our journey so far had been dark and treacherous and unknown, it was suddenly bright and peaceful. I took a picture of the sun in order to remember that moment. The time stamp on the pictures is 5:56 p.m. We did not know at the time that this was the exact moment Enzo’s body refused to take more air, and he was being placed in his mother’s arms for the last time on this earth. A short time later, the sun dropped back behind the clouds, never to reappear again on our trip.

Had God not interrupted our original route, we would not have seen this glorious sunset. Because the sun appeared to us at the exact time of Enzo’s homecoming, we are certain it was the Lord coming for Enzo. Jesus was bringing peace to our family and saying that we will survive… thrive… even without our precious Zo to share our lives. This picture became prominent over the next few days in our family. We used it as the main backdrop for the Memorial Service and titled it “Zo’s Sunset.”

Although grief is a long journey, I was also encouraged by the way God used my physical journey up to Seattle to mirror what grief feels like. There are times, like on the Wyoming Interstate  in the dead of night, which will be dark, full of despair and going nowhere (seemingly). There will be days we feel numb, cloudy and bland. Sometimes all we want to do is get through the darkness as fast as possible to get to the light at the end. But it takes time and it is not healthy to speed up the process. While stopped on I-80, I even told Michelle I just wanted to turn around, go home and wake up from this nightmare. But it was not to be done. We had to drive that lonely, dark stretch of road, just as we must walk through the grief in all it’s fear and darkness, to get where we are going.

But what awaits us at the end is the light. Oh so glorious in all its splendor and warmth. The light from Christ that gives us the hope that we will one day be with Enzo again – this time with no tears, no weeping, no sorrow – in a perfect place! That sunset made the entire trip before it worth it. (Not that I look forward to the darkness when I must walk it again!).

Psalm 23

"The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness, for His name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me. Your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me, in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil, my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. "

Life from death, beauty from ashes

God has been doing some amazing work in people's lives in the last week since Enzo's death. Some of these testimonies were given at the Memorial Service last Tuesday (and I intend to write about them and post them here).

Last night, a long time family friend sent this to our family:


"A Grain of Wheat"

John 12:24 "I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat is planted in the soil and
dies, it remains alone. But its death will produce many new kernels-a
plentiful harvest of new lives."

"This last weekend while thinking and praying for Enzo, the verse above came
to mind.  As I sat in the memorial on Tuesday, I saw God's Word come alive
before my eyes.  In the fertile ground that surrounded the tragic and
heartbreaking loss of Enzo, I saw a beautiful tree emerge that was ripe and
plentiful with fruit that God intends to harvest and is harvesting.  Heaven
will only reveal this great harvest, by God's great grace and mercy, that
will come from your great loss and sorrow."

Thank you so very much to Todd Kjormoe for your love and insights!


Additionally, this verse has come to mind for all the amazing work God is doing: 

Isaiah 61:3
"To all who mourn he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for his own glory."

Friday, October 15, 2010

Let Our "New Normal" Begin

Last night as I crawled into my own bed, I was struck by the difference between this night and the last time I was there. Last week, I “slept” in my own bed with the light on, my laptop open next to me and both of my phone ringers on loud. Adrenaline coursed through my body and though there was no other sound in my house, I was not quiet. I couldn’t be. But still, that night I went to bed fairly certain Zo was going to be fine. After all, people in my family don’t get seriously injured, much less die. In my 30 years of life, young people in my family stay healthy, vibrant and alive.

Until now.

Last night – eight days later - as I crawled into bed, I had the lights off. I had no media devices around. My body was quiet, tired and numb. And this time, I was wearing a beaded bracelet in honor of Zo’s memory.

Trying to fall asleep,  I remembered our last week. Our horrible and wonderful, our hope-filled and grief-stricken last week. I never knew it was possible to feel all of those things right at the same time.

Over the next few days (hopefully), I will be blogging the happenings of the last week, as our family has begun  the road of the deepest grief and surest hope. It will not just be my point of view, as I hope to get tidbits from the rest of the family as well.

Please continue your prayers as REAL life begins and we learn to walk in it.

Grace and Peace,
Auntie Melissa

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Fundraiser this weekend - no updates til Friday

Hello dear friends - what an INCREDIBLE Memorial Service we had today for our sweet Enzo! I plan to write all about it and share on here, but will be on the road heading home for a few days and will be unable to post. I promise to have something real soon. I told many people today at the service that I will keep this blog going forever, as long as people still read it. I plan to advertise fundraising and support efforts, make needs known, slowly begin posting pictures of the last week, and write updates for the Williams family and how they are holding up.

Just one tidbit before I go - there will be a car wash fundraiser this coming Saturday at the Chevron on Wheaton Way (next to the Jack In The Box) at 10:00 a.m. Any others I should know about, don't hesitate to let me know and I will advertise them on this blog.

Many people said today that in 6 months, Zo has touched and changed more lives than most people do in a lifetime. I am so grateful for this venue to communicate. Don't be shy to post comments - we read them ALL!

Grace and Peace,
Auntie Melissa

Monday, October 11, 2010

Dress for the Memorial Service

Hello dear friends and loved ones - if you are planning to join us tomorrow to celebrate Enzo's life, please don't feel you have to wear black (though you certainly can if you would like). Todd and Kate really want to atmosphere to be of love, happiness and celebration and therefore our decoration and dress will not be somber.

Today has been a good day. Two more family members have flown in and we have done some shopping, played outside in the rare sunshine, planned last minute details for the memorial, etc. We have also taken time to look at sweet pictures of Zo, which was medicine to the soul. We are all together this evening to enjoy a lasagna dinner from dear friends. What a blessing that we can all gather, laugh and enjoy each other even during the darkest of days. The laughter, voices and warmth in Amy (my sister's) home is healing.

This morning, Mom and Dad, Grandpa and Grandma, two of my uncles and a family friend went to Todd and Kate's house to clean and organize. They have not been back since before the accident. They cleaned, organized Zo's things and made some repairs on the house so that they can go back without the added pressure of those things. It will be hard enough going back to their home without Zo.

Additionally, my Dad (Zo's grandpa) and Uncle went to the wrecking yard to see the Kia that was totaled last Wednesday in the crash. They cleaned it out, recovered the personal effects and took pictures of the car itself and Zo's carseat. The pictures are incredible to say the least. As we all stood around uncle Rick's computer viewing them, we were praising Jesus that Ulysses and Sadie were not injured. The right back of the car is crushed into the front.We may have had to see Zozo leave this earth, but we are so thankful the rest of the family is still here with us and injury free.

Todd and Kate amaze me at how well they are holding up. Of course this is a very difficult time for them, but they are holding their heads high, trusting in the Lord and taking one step at a time. Tears still fall but we are not grieving without hope.

We love you all - hope to see you tomorrow!

Grace and Peace,

Saturday, October 9, 2010

You are invited to the Memorial Service

The Memorial Service for Enzo Williams will be this coming Tuesday, October 12, at 11:00 a.m., at Peninsula Bible Fellowship in Bremerton. We welcome you to join with us as we celebrate Enzo's short life and his new life in eternity. PBF is located at 9590 Radcliff Ave NE, Bremerton, WA 98311.

"We do not mourn as those who have no hope." 1 Thessalonians 4:13

Grace and Peace,

THANK YOU for the flowers and balloons

Kate just drove by the scene of the accident and saw that someone had put up flowers and balloons in the intersection in honor of Enzo's life. She wanted me to post this saying "THANK YOU" to whoever did that.... amazing how many good samaritans have come our way this week. You are all a blessing to us!!!

Praising through the storm,
Auntie Melissa
"And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you." ‎1 Peter 5:10 

The family is doing pretty okay today as we pick up family from the airport, arrange plane tickets, make funeral preparations and enjoy being together. Thank you to everyone for all your prayers and support. The above verse is of great comfort to us right now.

More later!

Grace and Peace,
Auntie Melissa

In the loving arms of Jesus

Greetings loved ones.

Friday evening at 6:01 p.m., Enzo passed from this life into the next, from the arms of his mother, into the arms of his creator in Heaven. We all miss him terribly already, but we know that he is having a party like we could never imagine on this earth. We are so very happy for him and yet so very grieved that we cannot be with him anymore. But for those who believe in Jesus Christ, we will see Enzo one day again soon and look forward to that day with eager anticipation.

Here is a great article on the roller coaster of the last 24 hours for us:

Our family has received literally THOUSANDS of calls, letters, messages, offers, etc from friends and strangers alike. Kitsap County seems to be abuzz with the story of lil Zo's death and we are so humbly honored at the outpouring of love and generosity by everyone. THANK YOU to all for your prayers and support.

There are two ways you can donate to help Kate and her family recover funeral, medical and other costs: You can make a donation at any Kitsap Federal Credit Union location to THE WILLIAMS FUND; or you can simply click on the "donate" button at the top right hand of this page and use any credit card. Of course 100% of proceeds go directly to the Williams Family.

I (Zo's auntie) have just arrived in Washington (I live in Colorado Springs, CO) and therefore will now be able to update this more frequently. Our second sister lives here locally, our third sister has flown in from Detroit, and numerous other family members are arriving as well.

Grace and Peace,

Friday, October 8, 2010

Praying for a MIRACLE!

Sorry for the short and infrequent updates as I get up to Seattle - this morning Zo is having some responsiveness in his legs and one arm - I don't know any further details yet - but we are encouraged by this news and PRAYING WITHOUT CEASING for our precious Zo that he will pull through! Please join us in prayer to our great Lord....
On a side note, this blog has had 20,000 hits since it was created at 11:00p.m. Wednesday night - amazing!!!! Our family is so, so touched that so many people care!
I am in Salt Lake City, hoping to arrive in Tacoma this evening and will definitely have more descriptive updates for you all.
Grace and Peace,
Auntie Melissa
PSALM 77:14 "You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the people!"

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Last update for awhile

There has been no change in Enzo's condition.... you will not hear from me for awhile as I drive up to Seattle.... I will post as soon as I can.


Unfortunately, the news is not good right now. The doctor said that Zo cannot breathe on his own and his brain activity is falling. The pressure on his brain is tremendous still. He is on his way to another CT scan right now.

No update yet.... more news coverage

I feel honored that so many people are lifting our family up in prayer.... here is some more new coverage of the wreck:
"Pray continually......." 1 Thessalonians 5:16
Grace and Peace,


Psalm 34:18 "The Lord is close to the broken hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit."

No, there has been no change in Enzo's condition yet. But the title of this post was born out of the realization this morning that no matter what, we have HOPE. Our hope is not in Enzo's condition improving - though that is what we are praying for. Our hope is not in the lives of those around us. The only SURE thing we have in this life to place our hope in - the one thing that will NEVER change - is the hope found in Jesus Christ and His unfailing love, His salvation and His promises. The world could crumble around us and yet this is the one thing that can never be taken from us.

Isaiah 41:10 "So do not fear, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

We don't know why God is allowing this suffering, but He is GOOD and Enzo is in no better hands than that of His creator.

Please keep praying....

Good morning to all - last night the doctors said it would get worse before it gets better. This morning, the "worse" is happening. We just got word that Enzo's brain swelling is at a lethal level. The pressure on his brain is at 100 (Sorry I do not know the correct medical terminology) when a normal person's is between 5 and 10. They are going to run another CAT Scan this morning..... more updates as I know....

Latest update tonight

... or shall I say this morning? How did it get to be 2:30 a.m. already?
I just spoke to Kate and the X-rays have come back and shown that Zo has a slightly bruised windpipe, but the doctors aren't concerned about it. And other than the head injury, the rest of his body is in good shape and intact. Yay!
Of course the head injury isn't good though.... the doctor said it will get worse before it gets better. It will be some time before they know exactly what they are dealing with.
Not that ANYTHING about this has been funny... but if you would like to be distracted for a slight moment from all of this heavy information, I will pass along a slightly amusing tidbit. Apparently the impact knocked Kate's shoes right off of her feet. When she jumped out of the car (after they stopped spinning) to get her kids, she realized she had no shoes on. I asked where the shoes were and she doesn't know because she never returned to the car. Then I asked Kate what she is wearing on her feet right now at the hospital. She said that a lady stopped and gave her the shoes right off her own feet. Amazing how wonderful people can be!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Initial reports

Zo has arrived at the children's hospital and is currently having a CAT Scan done. Initial reports from the doctor say that his skull is fractured and his brain is bruised. He is currently on a ventilator and being kept sedated. More updates as I receive them from my family....

The accident

Here is one article:
Another view of the car:
Here is what happened:
At 7:48 p.m. (according to police reports) Kate (my sister) was heading north on Hwy 303 in Bremerton, just in front of Fred Meyer, waiting in the left hand turn lane. A big Yukon SUV came from behind and smashed into the right side of the car (as you can see from the picture). Kate's little Kia Spectra then was spun around from the impact. Apparently this caused two other cars to crash as well, but I do not have details on that yet. Eyewitnesses later said that the driver of the Yukon was taken away in a police car, but I have not confirmed that yet either. Todd, Kate, Ulysses, Sadie and Enzo were all wearing seatbelts and carseats. Kate's groceries and school backpack was strewn all over the road (Kate is currently studying to be a dental assistant). Enzo was in his backwards facing carseat in the back right seat. He was not breathing at first and when the paramedics arrived, they performed CPR and decided to airlift him to the Children's Hospital in Tacoma. Ulysses and Sadie were shaken but ok - from what I understand do not have a scratch on them. Todd and Kate are also injury free. They were all checked out by the paramedics and released after declining to be taken to the hospital (they wanted to get to Tacoma to be with Zo).
As more details become available, I will edit this story.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE pray that no matter what the outcome, my family would draw close to Jesus during this time and that He would provide us comfort and healing.